Evelyn Turns One!

2/16/2023

Today marks my one year anniversary as Evelyn. 

I’m terrible at remembering anniversaries. And birthdays. Frankly, I’m pretty bad at remembering holidays, too. Even the ones that fall on the same day every year. 

So it comes as no surprise that even though I was looking forward to my one year mark, I forgot all about it until I was getting ready for my date earlier this evening. Since remembering, I’ve felt a bit introspective. A little reflective. And, overall, extremely grateful. 

At first I couldn’t decide if it felt more like a birthday or an anniversary. Technically, Evelyn was created a year ago. So, a birthday seemed apt. But then, Evelyn is just me. With a different name, and a few facts changed for safety purposes, but still me. So, anniversary seemed more appropriate.

But, it wasn’t always that way.

You see, a year ago I met with my first client. I was nervous, of course, but excited too. 

I had no idea how to present myself as “Evelyn”. I thought I had to compartmentalize my work, and create a harsh line of separation between my job self and my real self. I thought I had to become appealing to every client based on their individual likes, wants, and needs. So I began to craft an idea in my head of who Evelyn was. I attempted to create a persona. 

Unfortunately, I have a very low tolerance for inauthenticity. Especially and including my own. 

It was in my third booking that my client asked me what sort of music I liked. I froze, racking my brain. This wasn’t something I’d thought of yet! I was running through music genres in my head, trying to decide which type of music went with my idea of who Evelyn was. 

After a few seconds, I decided to say fuck it. 

Evelyn and I could like the same type of music. Hell, we could like all of the same things! I didn’t need to create some character in order to be a compassionate, caring, and passionate companion. And I was tired of trying to act like someone I wasn’t. I’ve never been a great actress. 

So, I told them I liked jazz. And the blues. Musical numbers are great too. House music. Folk. 

And the conversation continued with barely a moment's pause. Outwardly, nothing had changed. But inside I felt immensely relieved for the rest of the date, and for every date thereafter. 

I didn’t need to compartmentalize my work. I wasn’t worried about taking it home with me and bringing me down in some way, because I loved what I was doing. 

I adored meeting new people, and getting to know them. I loved the way I would welcome them with warmth, and they opened up in response. I got to explore people’s bodies and find what made them tick, bringing them pleasure until their hands gripped the sheets and their backs arched off the bed. I held people’s hands as they shared desires they’d never told anyone before, and helped bring those fantasies into a reality. I shared soft, gentle moments and steamy, passionate pairings in which we communicated exclusively through touch and moans. 

Basically, I was in my own personal candy shop. 

So instead of trying to be someone else, I started focusing on taking care of myself. I wanted to be the best version of myself to share with the world. I wanted to show up for every date happy, healthy, and energized. I cut out the things in life that weren’t serving me, and made my happiness and mental health my top priority. 

I wanted to become a source of joy for my lovers, and the best way I could think of was to become joyful myself. I’ve always heard happiness is contagious, and while my own personal experience is not universal, I’ve found it to be quite true in my encounters. 

It has been my hope that if I were authentically myself, that my clients would feel that, and be comfortable showing their authentic selves too. I wanted to create a space, wherever we were, that we could be ourselves together in an environment that is warm, welcoming, and wholesome. And, alright, a little raw, sensual, and distinctly unwholesome at times too. But only in the best of ways. 

And when we’re both being ourselves and we really, truly, click - that’s my favorite part about this work. Because when I’m really myself, I know the connections I’m building are real. My clients don’t like me because of the facade I’m putting on, they like me for me. And I adore them for showing up with their true self, sharing time while we get lost in each other for however long that day, and however many times thereafter. 

I’ve been told by some clients that I’ve restored their faith in life, love, and relationships. I’ve seen sides of people they haven’t shared with anyone else. I’ve celebrated triumphs, and consoled through hard times. I’m not a therapist, but I’ve been told I’m therapeutic. For some, I’ve been 60 minutes of ice breaking leading to unbridled passion wedged into their itinerary during a trip to Michigan; likely not to be seen again. For others, I’m a consistent companion to share part of their life with. When I became Evelyn, I didn’t foresee the sheer range of experiences I would have. 

Every relationship I have is different. Every client is unique. Every date is a new experience.

And I am so grateful for all of it. 

I knew from the start that this work was for me, because it felt as comfortable and as natural as coming home. It’s in my nature to be compassionate. And passionate. I’m endlessly curious about people, and a devoted sensualist who seeks indulgence and joy wherever it may be found. 

I have high standards for those I share my time with, and reserve my space for people with whom I share mutual respect, affection, and genuine warmth. It’s taken work to get here and find balance, and I’ve learned a lot in the last year. For all the good, there’s also been tough lessons, enforcing difficult boundaries, and cutting off those who are not meant for me. But there has never not been gratitude. 

Cheers to one year, and here’s to many more!